Wow this Training really works!
haha! I mean it. My little brother says stuff like that all the time & I scoff at him. He's 25 & he'll say "You know, I'm really growing up" or "I've matured so much" and the old-older sister cynic in me would think "YA RIGHT" show me a person who tells me they've changed & I'll show you miles to go.
But, I think this is true.
I feel change a brewin' And I see it in my life.
I've been renting a room in my home the past month for extra $, while G's been away.
There was this great girl who was going to rent it- and then I got an email from some kid with a golden doodle and I was hypnotized like a Barracuda to a shiny object. The funny thing is I don't really have that "oh my goodness doggie" gene.
But I always thought golden doodle's were cool.
I received his email and it said he had a dog & he was in a bind. I said to myself "if he says golden doodle he's in"
Wait for the email reply: what kind of dog? GOLDENDOODLE. Ok, I think . done.
He moves in. Things start to unfold that are undesirable. His youth becomes apparent. I am no old hen. But I'm 30. Been through college, grad school, real life situations- been on my own since I was thru with my B.A. I've had all types of roommates. I've rented rooms, shared houses, etc. Been there!
So, anyways.
exhibit A.
I'm working at my part time job (another entry entirely!). My phone rings. The kid who rents the room is on the phone, he asks me if he can use an outlet in my room to cut his hair?
huh? there are outlets in his room..why my room? He says his outlets are being used. haha, I think. Those pesty- cemented in outlets, it's so hard to unplug a chord nowadays. But I kindly tell him- I think his own room would suffice for his haircutting.
exhibit B.
He consumes my food & beverages. Ask him nicely to replace: 2 weeks. no replacing...
I could go on- but I'll save this one for last.
3 am Saturday morning. Drunk he invites his friends to sleep over and plugs in a machine to pump up his aerobed...It sounded like machine guns. Not ok.
I go out to the hall and tell him that this isn't ok. And that I don't think I need to remind him that this isn't a dorm.
He tells me his friends are too drunk to take cabs. Hmm, Thats what I thought cabs were for? drunk people.
Any hoot. Go to yoga training the next day. Realize this has to end. I need to give him the facts: this isn't working. We are clearly living different lifestyles. I don't feel that it is my job to teach him how to cohabitate in this type of communal setting. I don't think the respect is there. I am not judging his way of life- I just don't think we work with simpatico.
We talk. I tell him. I remain calm. No confrontation. Tell him he's paid up till April 1st- but I'd like him to find another place by then. Tell him I'm in no way judging him- it's just not a good fit. This feels good. To be Honest, but still compassionate. No digs. No drama. This is the truth. Wow. I ask him to please be respectful for the remaining month.
He seems to register.
The old me would have been a little more harsh. I would have pointed out things that would have hurt his feelings. I would have said that I disagree with how he treats his dog. Caged all day in a dark room. Crying & Whimpering. I would've commented on his lack of knowledge of how to clean or sweep bathrooms or floors. I would've said he blows his nose & clears his throat too much & too loudly. Or, Him telling his poor dog to "shut up" 10x a day is more disruptive than the poor pup.
Those would've been digs.
I would've said them & felt guilty after. That is a horrible way to be. In my willingness to change- I am thankful and dare I say proud with how I handled this strange renter situation.
I am growing! But I still have miles to go......... :)
